Also can we drop the term "granny panties?"

My Facebook feed is filled with underwear. Yours probably is, too.

It's the case of granny panties vs. thongs.

According to the New York Times, sales of thongs have gone down 7% in the last year, while "granny panties" sales have increased by 17%.

Personally, I don't think a 7% decline is such a fuss, but it is, and it's trending all over the Internet, so let's talk about it.

The article says that Millennials are buying granny panties because they're feminists. Really? You are choosing your underwear because of your stance on feminist issues?

I think your underwear should have nothing to do with politics, but all to do with preventing a wedgie or an unfortunate underwear line.

Seriously, be a feminist if you want, but you can still wear a variety of underwear.

Let's take a deep dive here. Ladies think about your underwear drawer. Ya there?

Ok, so here's what you probably have. You have 10 pairs of underwear you never wear ever. They just sit there. And why do they sit there? Because they are uncomfortable! Then you have fancy underwear that you save for special occasions, whatever those may be... then, you have that 50% of the underwear in that drawer that you actually wear.

Why do you wear those? Because they are comfortable and wedgie free. No one likes a wedgie. If you do, I want to talk to you and understand your wedgie love, because you might want to talk to someone about that.

So that is why I think the sale of thongs has declined. It's not about feminism, it's about wedgies. I don't know if it's just because I'm in my late twenties and more comfortable with life than I used to be, or if it's the comfy culture we live in now, but I think we are just all about being comfy and wedgie free whenever possible, in comparison to the ladies of the late 90s and early 2000s, who were about the thong.

Blame Sisqo.

For example: I had a conversation with my friend Lori on the way to work today about thongs. I said I have like four or five or them, but only wear them when necessary, like the magical thong I bought to wear at her wedding. It was pure magic guys. I'd wear it everyday if I wasn't afraid of wearing the magic out... she mentioned that she used to wear thongs all the time, back in her blonde bombshell days.

Her bombshell days? 2000s.

So even though I hate the term "granny panties" because I think that means your underwear goes alllllll the way up to your boobs... I guess that's the term we are using for any non-thongs, let's take a vote.

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