I promise you can take those earrings off.

When you sit down at the table.

That's the rules, bridesmaids. Unless you have a medical reason not to wear an ugly necklace, tacky lipstick or slightly painful shoes, you have to do it.

I love all my friends, I especially love all of you who have had me in your weddings, but let's be real here, I don't love every single piece of jewelry and shoe that I wore in your weddings.

But I wore them anyway, cuz duh, I love you.

So that's the rules.

 

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