When the Next Illinois Snow Storm Hits—Don’t Do This!

Attention, people over 45: it's time to retire your snow shovels, snowblowers, and any other tools of icy torture. Why? Because winter isn’t just trying to ruin your morning commute—it’s apparently also gunning for your ticker.

Winter Storm Warning: The Perfect Storm for a Heart Attack Is Here

Every year, thousands of people get injured and dozens die doing this one ridiculous task. And guess what? It’s not worth the pulled muscles, lower back strain, or—oh yeah—the heart attack.

The Warning Illinois Over-45s Need to Hear (and Kids Need to Heed)

Doctors and scientists (a.k.a. people who went to school way too long) agree: People over 45 should not be shoveling snow. That’s right, shoveling snow is officially canceled. Not just for dads, but for moms, too. Science says no one over 45 should be out there creating the “perfect storm” for a heart attack.

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Here’s the deal:

• Cold temps jack up your blood pressure and tighten your arteries.
• Wet, heavy snow? That’s just a heart attack waiting to happen.
• And the exertion? It’s like winter CrossFit but way less cool.

MORE: Illinoisans, Do This Immediately After A Major Snowstorm

Hey kids, Mom and Dad don't want to die of a heart attack in the driveway, so it's on y'all to move it.

And while we're on the subject of clearing this driveway, I won't be pushing the big red snow blower either.

MORE: 3 Important Things to Do Before a Winter Storm in Illinois

So, dear kids: It’s officially your job now. Mom and Dad don’t want to become driveway decorations, so grab the shovel and start bonding with nature.

And before you even think of handing me the snowblower, let me stop you right there. No way am I messing with that beast. Instead, I’ll be inside, sipping hot chocolate, ready to toss your snow-soaked mittens in the laundry—which, by the way, is also hazardous for people over 45. After the cocoa break, I’ll show you how to do the laundry yourself.

Welcome to adulthood, kids. Winter chores are now your problem.

You'll find all the details about this important health warning HERE.