So your drink really does say something about you! This list might be necessary this weekend.

Thank you Cosmo for bringing us this article about what our drinks say about our personality, because when you order a vodka lemonade from the bartender, don't you want to know what message you're sending him?

When given the choice of any cocktail ever, I would choose a watermelon margarita. But sometimes, you're at a dive bar and you know if you ordered a watermelon margarita the owner would say, "Michelle, did you forget where you are? You drink vodka lemonade here."

So that's what I order there. Weddings? Vodka lemonade or vodka cranberry with Sprite. I also drink wine at Italian restaurants or on like a Wednesday. So I guess I fall into a few of these categories... but mostly I love margs.

Cosmo doesn't cite a source here so it looks like the author decided on these descriptions, but let's take them to the bar this weekend, very slightly edited list is below.

Vodka cranberry. You are a college student or recent graduate. The bar you just ordered this in has mysteriously damp floors. You own one basic blazer that you wear with everything, and you just realized it's going to smell like vodka tomorrow. Your feet hurt. Why is it so loud in here, and why did you agree to go out tonight, and WHY IS THE RATIO OF VODKA TO CRANBERRY ALWAYS SO UNEVEN?

Whiskey sour. You've graduated from vodka cranberries and can't handle straight whiskey, but you like yourself a tangy drink. You drunk-text.

Whiskey straight. You're a big hit with guys.

Vodka soda. You're in it to get smashed. Not for the taste, or for the calories. You do Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred while most of us are lying in bed with our three-legged cat watching Pawn Stars. When discussing how great you feel how that you've cut dairy out of your diet, there is a glint in your eyes that is near madness. You talk about your "personal brand" a lot. You probably scare the shit out of me.

Rosé You are unapologetically girly. Drinking rose-colored wine, for you, is like getting crunk on a delicious Sephora perfume sample that will coat your insides with Sparklebeauty. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

Tequila & soda. Jesus, you're a badass. Where'd you hide the body?

Margarita. You are a fun drunk who, by the third round, always winds up telling some humiliating sex story. You are most comfortable in a Health Department B-rated Tex-Mex joint. Everyone knows they make the best margaritas.

PBR You have non-prescription glasses and might own a three-wolf-moon t-shirt. You have a lot of friends in bands with names like Fingerbang or The Jesse Spano Problem.

Red wine. You're a driven workaholic who's only able to relax and stop checking your office email after two glasses. Your role model is Olivia from Scandal.

White wine. You might have had a drama-heavy phase in your teen years, but that's over now. You watch at least one Real Housewives franchise, either ironically or unironically.

Gin and tonic. You are either a mega WASP or a jazz

performer. Either way, take off that silly-ass hat.

Manhattan. You have the soul of an old dude with barely-functioning taste buds.

Cosmopolitan. You are cool as hell. Come over.

Mint Julep. You're possibly Southern and definitely classy. There's potpourri in your bathroom. You love Taylor Swift. (But who doesn't?)

Screwdriver. You did a lot of high school drinking in the basement of a friend with a "cool mom" back in your suburban hometown. You're unpretentious. You make amazing next-day hangover pasta for your friends.

Mojito. You're smart and independent, albeit occasionally thoughtless (making a busy bartender crush mint? Kind of high-maintenance of you). You might be in your head too much.

Irish Car Bomb. You like Family Guy and own one of those "No Fatties" t-shirts. You popped your collar in high school. You're probably not Irish-born, because ordering one in Ireland is offensive.

Sake. You recently moved to a big city from a smaller town and are excited to try new things. Little did you know you'd end up in a stranger's bed with your bra on backwards.

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